Like any other couple, Gerald and I had our share of ups and downs. Creating this blog made me realize how our relationship now has come a long way from what it was before…
Circa 2004-2006, blogging was the “in” thing then. Ge had his own blog, I also had mine. I wanted us to have a joint blog but Gerald was against the idea because he thought that a blog is where we can express our INDIVIDUALITY, and how a blog is a reflection of our OWN personalities. I was so inggit at couples then who had their joint blogs where they expressed their undying love for each other. Fast forward to now. Imagine my surprise when Ge told me he wanted US to create OUR blog to document our trips, food finds and day to day lives in PGH.
When we became an “us”, most of our iMed friends were not surprised. They saw that coming. As friends/barkada, we were very similar, we had the same tastes, interests and personalities. Some friends even said that Maan was the babaeng Gerald. I thought so too. Boy, was I wrong. And when i realized it, it hurt.
I believed in happily ever after, romance, passion, much like the heroines in the novels (and yes, fairytales) that I’ve read. I was so in the girlfriend-boyfriend, in a relationship, kind of thing. Quoting from Fifty Shades of Grey, I wanted hearts and flowers. Gerald did not. In fact, I can count with only my five fingers the number of times he gave me flowers during our 8 years together!
Gerald on the other hand, was the opposite. He was simply the “I’m just happy to be with you” kind of guy. Nothing fancy, no thrills, no frills, just “Hi, this is Maan”, and not “Hi, this is Maan, my GIRLFRIEND (with love-sick puppy look in his eyes).” There were times I thought our relationship was boring.
When those differences became apparent, the petty fights came about. I wanted him to text me good night, I love you, every night, but he did not. I wanted him to say he misses me (I know… weekend lang kami magkahiwalay, over! :P), but of course, he did not. I wanted to tickle him (because I thought it was sweet, and fun!) but he would just brush my fingers away with that very mataray look on his face. He wanted to go out with brods, I wanted us to go out on a date. He wanted to just sleep after a duty and I wanted us to cook dinner then watch a home movie after.
There were two instances when we broke up (cool-off actually, but the term is so high school! :P). First was during 2nd year med proper when I called him “obese”. He took my joke seriously! I saw how his faced crumpled then and how it turned to anger. He did not speak to me for days. Okay, 3 days. Then we got back together. The second time was after we watched the movie If Only. I could totally relate to Jennifer Love Hewitt–the unappreciated girlfriend who gave everything to her man. We cried buckets after the movie, then went on to discuss it. I couldn’t help but spill the beans–I felt like her, unappreciated, unwanted, unloved. Gerald then thought i expected damn too much from him. We broke up. For 3 days again. Then got back together. 🙂
These petty fights and misunderstandings lessened through the years. Looking back, we could have been too young then to be in a serious relationship. But as we stayed together, and grew up (literally) beside each other, we learned to accept each other’s misgivings and shortcomings. I learned to expect less, but held every trickle of a mushy text message, an “I love you” out of the blue, quick kiss and hug, close to my heart. Gerald learned to give more–staying with me instead of going to a frat inuman (sorry brods!), surprising me with a date in Antonio’s and Ninyo, and finally, when he asked me to marry him ( I got flowers this time, 2 dozens!).
Last night, we had a re-run of the movie If Only. Instead of tears, we just laughed through the movie as we remembered our silliness and ridiculousness when we broke up years ago because of that. Hell, it wasn’t even a good movie, we realize now!
Our relationship has overcome difficulties in the past but i’m pretty sure there will be more fights, petty or not, in the future years to come as we live our lives together… Why did you leave the toilet seat up? Why didn’t you wash the dishes? Bakit nagshopping ka na naman? Etc etc. But I’m pretty sure that after every fight we will learn and forget the hurt, like we did in the past… We will grow up more, wiser, older, together, FOREVER. Right, bibi? I love you. 😡